Publish at May 17 2020 Updated September 27 2023
When learning a new language, who hasn't asked themselves: "Why isn't this my mother tongue? That would have been easier!" Yes, the age-old "I would have liked to have been an artist", so dear to the Franco-Quebec duo Luc Plamondon and Michel Berger and their rock opera Starmania (1979), can also be heard in language versions!
But what about when it comes to questioning one's linguistic orientation without having chosen to learn another language, as may be the case for adopted children, for example?
Between mother tongue and adopted language, how can we help a child find his or her bearings and better integrate into his or her new life?
Adoption. It's a subject we don't talk much about, and that's a shame, because many children are waiting to find parents, just as many parents, whether couples or singles, are eager to welcome a child into their family. When it's a baby or a toddler, it's less complicated, as there's no real background, no memories of the past, no history. The child's culture and language of origin are not yet firmly rooted, and so the adopted child will find it easier, or at least less difficult, to adapt to his or her new life, new country and new language.
But when it comes to a child who's already grown up, with a past, a history, a language and a culture that's already been around for many years, it's a different kettle of fish. In addition to mourning the loss of their cultural background, and adapting to their new family and host country, they'll also have to change their language and learn a new one. It's a cruel dilemma to have to abandon one's past, turn the page for good and write a new story, even changing one's language, to better integrate into one's new family and new life.
Over 30,000 intercountry adoptions take place worldwide every year, and the relationship between language and adoption is a very important one, given that when a child leaves his or her own country, he or she also marks the end of exposure to the language of birth. The break is abrupt and clear-cut, but can it be a smooth one?
Several researchers have examined this question, and all seem to agree: the cognitive and linguistic adaptation capacities of adopted children are incredibly rapid and effective.
Indeed, according to De Geer, Glennen, Masters, Nicoladis and Grabois, all eminent child psychologists or specialists, "attrition (meaning the reduction or settling of initially acquired linguistic knowledge that can lead to the extinction of a language) from the mother tongue seems rapid, since adopted children lose their birth language within a few months".
The same applies to older children, as Rygvold and Grindis point out, adding that they tend not to understand or even express their first language. This is referred to as "subtractive bilingualism", with the loss of the mother tongue occurring at the same time as the learning of the host language. In this sense, the term bilingualism itself doesn't seem very apt, as there's more of a shift from one language to the other than a coexistence of the two.
It's true that an (already grown-up) adopted child will learn the language more quickly, but it's also important to guide him or her so that this happens smoothly. This is a new life for them, but also for their adoptive parents! For them too, the language shock is new!
Several options are available. First and foremost, if the future parent knows a little of the language of the chosen country, that's a good thing! Communication will be simpler, or at least will have the merit of existing! Indeed, for any French-speaker, for example, it will surely be easier - linguistically speaking - to adopt a Spanish-speaking child than a Chinese- or Russian-speaking one! Even the few bits of Spanish you learn at school will come in handy when the time comes. Here too, it's a good idea for parents to make an effort to recover or learn their future child's mother tongue, as this will create a much more relaxed atmosphere and boost the child's confidence, as he or she will feel "understood".
However, it's important to remember that to better integrate into their new country and society, and their future friends at school, children will need to quickly acquire their new language.
That's why you need to multiply the number of interactions in the new language as much as possible: at home, outside the home, with the family, in social situations, in sports and leisure activities, but also on TV, playing games, singing, reading with your child... there's no shortage of activities. Everything should be a pretext for using the language in context, so that the child can see for himself that his new world is being created in this language, and that he feels comfortable, at ease, comforted and integrated.
Finally, adoption is a moment in life that is as unsettling for the adopted child as it is for the new adoptive parent. This shock is as much a family affair as a linguistic one, and everyone must do their best to ensure that integration goes smoothly. It's true that "classes d'accueil", as is the case in Quebec, are examples of successful linguistic integration for allophone children, and this concept deserves to be developed just about everywhere in the world because of its originality and effectiveness.
After all, we're not asking the child to wipe out all his past, just to continue writing his story. Just like a series with several seasons, the first of his life was elsewhere, the second, the sequel, is just beginning, and there's no need for subtitles here, as the original language has been changed...
Sources and illustrations
-L'enfant adopté à l'étranger, entre langue maternelle et langue d'adoption, child psychiatry, 2012, CAIRN,
https://www.cairn.info/revue-la-psychiatrie-de-l-enfant-2012-1-page-315.htm#
-Learning several languages, Naître et grandir, https://naitreetgrandir.com/fr/etape/1_3_ans/langage/fiche.aspx?doc=ik-naitre-grandir-parole-langage-enfant-apprentissage-plusieurs-langue-bilinguisme
-Families of the world, Pixabay, https://pixabay.com/images/id-333064/
-Doublethink, Pixabay, https://pixabay.com/images/id-4983119/
-Cuckoo clock, Pixabay , https://pixabay.com/images/id-2053642/
-Child at school, Pixabay, https://pixabay.com/images/id-3189934/
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