Publish at October 24 2023 Updated October 24 2023
Death and bereavement are almost more taboo subjects than sexuality. We don't want to think about our own finality, nor do we wish to see others suffer those of someone close to us. Our relationship with grief has become almost consumerist and invisible. In earlier times, there were dress and social codes that indicated that this person was in the process.
As Vinciane Despret argues, this at least allowed individuals a certain tolerable withdrawal from the community. Today, administratively, we're only entitled to a few days off at most to sort out the paperwork, and many people don't understand 6 months or 1 year after the death why the sadness persists. What if, in the end, it's not necessary to mourn? The Belgian philosopher is interested in those who don't.
Freud himself said of his daughter's death that nothing could replace this absence. So, for some individuals, the process doesn't really happen. The dead still "exist" in certain moments of life. Please note that these are not mediums or people who claim to see ghosts. Most of those interviewed even confirm that the "presence" can be explained by psychology. Nevertheless, they recognize a certain "power of action" of the deceased in their lives.
Whether or not we agree with this approach is entirely up to us; the philosopher's position is not one of moralizing, but of observation. What if there was no mourning? Or if it didn't happen in the way today's ultra-productivist society demands, would that be so bad?
Running time: 19min28
Image: Sabine van Erp / Pixabay
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