Publish at October 22 2025 Updated October 22 2025
The famous consulting firm Deloitte was recently caught with its hand in the jam pot when it brought to light a report for the Australian government, riddled with errors and hallucinations produced by AI. Whether it's classwork or music produced by AI, the lies and secrecy of many politicians or the misinformation of social networks, lies surround us all.
So, you could say we're getting used to it, because it started early: from a very early age, we were led to believe in a guy dressed in red who comes every year at Christmas in his flying cart pulled by reins, handing out to every child the presents they've wished for. We've all finished our soup because our parents told us it made us grow faster, and we've all once told someone we loved that their quiche lorraine was admirable, even though it was undercooked.
Our indulgence of lies varies according to the intention of those who use them. It's probably because the function of lying is not constant, and that "Thou shalt not lie" remains a challenge, even a relational poison. It remains necessary to distinguish between calculated dishonesty and the concealment mechanisms necessary to community life and psychological survival.
Not all philosophers agree that lying is justified in certain circumstances. The controversy between Benjamin Constant and Immanuel Kant is a case in point. Kant, with his assertive rigorism, states.
"Truthfulness in declarations which cannot be avoided is the formal duty of man towards everyone, whatever grave inconvenience may result to himself or to another." (1)
Benjamin Constant counters
"The moral principle that telling the truth is a duty, if laid down absolutely and in isolation, would make any society impossible. We have proof of this in the direct consequences drawn from this principle by a German philosopher who goes so far as to claim that to assassins who would ask you whether your friend whom they are pursuing is not taking refuge in your house, lying would be a crime."
Constant, Des réactions politiques (chap. VIII, "Des principes").
Plato differentiates between true lying and lying in words, the former being strictly forbidden, the latter quite permissible, as it can be therapeutic. On the other hand, he seems to reserve lying in words, or "noble lying", for rulers only.
"It is therefore to those who govern the city, if indeed it must be granted to some, that belongs the possibility of lying, whether towards enemies, or towards citizens, when it is a question of the city's interest. For all others, it is out of the question that they should resort to it" (2).
For their part, the Stoics tinkered with this notion, ultimately joining Plato.
For Catholics, lying is only fatal if it seriously undermines justice and charity.
"If lying, in itself, constitutes only a venial sin, it becomes mortal when it gravely injures the virtues of justice and charity. [The right to communicate the truth is not unconditional. Everyone must live according to the Gospel precept of brotherly love. In concrete situations, this requires an assessment of whether or not it is appropriate to reveal the truth to the person asking for it." Excerpts from the Catechism of the Catholic Church (3)
Islam is rigorously rigorous when it comes to lies, bringing truth and sincerity closer together (5).
"Thus the Prophet says: "Sincerity leads to virtue, and virtue leads to Paradise. The man who always tells the truth will be numbered among the truthful. Lying, on the other hand, leads to immorality, and immorality leads to the Fire (of Hell). The man who spends his time lying ends up being numbered among the liars".
But his precepts are sometimes more measured on the notion of lying
"In specific circumstances, the Prophet Muhammad [...] authorized the use of lies for the purpose of fostering peace and harmony between people in conflict." (6)
For its part, the Talmud prohibits lying, but offers exceptions (7)
"It is permissible to deviate from the truth in order to promote peace". Hindus are not to be outdone, either, and also express their views on the necessary response to lying (8) "Bhishma says: "If lying under oath spares you the captivity of evil captors, then lie. As far as possible, do not let wealth fall into the hands of evil people, for riches offered to them will repel them and cause harm to the giver."
In short! Is it amoral to lie? From Plato to Schopenhauer, via Kant, Constant, Jankélévitch and Comte-Sponville, the answer is flexible. With the exception of Kant, all agree on the extent to which lying is intentional and realistic. "Schopenhauer appeals to the realism of everyday experience to challenge Kantian intransigence". (9)
One of the situations in which it can be natural to conceal the truth, if not to lie, is one we all experience, every day, when someone asks us "Are you all right?". Our almost automatic response remains "Yes, yes! I'm fine!", even if we've had a sleepless night, even if we're in family, health, financial or professional trouble.
The reasons may vary; the person asking you this question is only doing it to respect a social ritual. In such cases, it's not necessarily good manners to answer "No! I'm not feeling well at all!" Or maybe you just don't feel like it, don't have the energy, don't have the time to spend any time at all sharing with her the reasons for your unhappiness. Perhaps she's not part of your inner circle. Constantly exposing your pain or weakness is a social and energetic threat.
The "everything's fine" mask helps you manage your emotional resources. The mask of professionalism or banal politeness is an implicit social contract that keeps interactions effective.
The work of Eric Berne, the creator of Transactional Analysis, is enlightening when he talks about the structuring of time into six modes (10): withdrawal, ritual, pastime, activity, play and intimacy.
Eric Berne doesn't suggest that these modes require the voluntary implementation of a mask, as he argues that they are, in most cases, adaptations to the reality of a situation. Only the "Game" mode, illustrated by the famous Persecutor-Victim-Savior triangle, involves the wearing of a mask. On the other hand, these masks are worn without awareness, which makes it difficult to get out of manipulative games.
For his part, Winnicott, the inventor of the word "Self" (11) speaks of true and false selves. The false self is a facade personality developed in response to environmental expectations, enabling the individual to survive socially until the true self can express itself in a secure environment. In this case, the individual seeks to conform in order to avoid rejection or judgment.
Sometimes, then, the mask is simply an edited version of oneself, presented to fit in, avoid judgment or escape stereotyping. It's a survival strategy, but not a denial.
A prosocial lie is one that serves to preserve the psychological identity of the other person by masking too blunt a truth.
"Let's face it, most of us have said, at some point, something like "I'll always prefer sincerity to lies". What's more, there are plenty of people who insist that they always use the truth in all circumstances. However, before resorting to sincerity, it's more appropriate to use the pious lie, that false claim that one has a benevolent intention. Social relations are highly complex dynamics in which it is appropriate, from time to time, to resort to these ruses. The aim is none other than to safeguard the well-being and self-esteem of others." (12)
The unvarnished truth is often unnecessarily cruel. Lying or concealing a negative perception or opinion is an act of civility aimed at preserving the dignity or emotional well-being of the other person. Lying in this way respects the other person's privacy and, in some cases, the sovereignty of his or her speech. Not asking all the questions that come to mind, not commenting on all the weaknesses observed, is to wear a mask of respectful restraint. It means recognizing that the other person has the right to choose what he or she reveals.
The intention of prosocial lying lies in a desire to facilitate collective harmony. Small concealments are the invisible glue that holds relationships together. Not saying you're bored, pretending to agree, keeping quiet rather than saying something - this is the diplomacy of everyday life.
Wearing a mask can therefore be seen as a social skill designed to maintain its effectiveness, but not at the expense of the other person. What if true maturity was not to never lie, but to know when to wear a mask, consciously, without wishing to harm others or the collective, while preserving one's personal perimeter?
A life without filters, without respect for social codes, often leads to exhaustion, constant conflict and isolation, and is even a feature of certain personality disorders. The pathologies associated with Autistic Spectrum Disorders, for example, highlight the difficulties encountered in relating to others. These skills are usually acquired through observation and imitation. When this type of disorder is diagnosed, it becomes necessary to methodically learn these social skills to facilitate inclusion and communication.
Little lies or omissions can also be seen as relationship management tools, means of regulation and social survival. This legitimizes the idea that, in complex situations, moral responsibility and empathy can take precedence over the duty of absolute truth.
References
1 On the alleged right to lie out of humanity - Wikipedia
https://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/D%27un_pr%C3%A9tendu_droit_de_mentir_par_humanit%C3%A9
2 Discours sur le mensonge de Platon à saint Augustin : continuité ou rupture - Cairn Info - Pierre Sarr- 2010- https://shs.cairn.info/revue-dialogues-d-histoire-ancienne-2010-2-page-9?lang=fr
3 Catechism of the Catholic Church -1992-
https://www.unifr.ch/tmf/fr/assets/public/files/courses/seminars/cec-sur-le-mensonge-textes.pdf
4 "L'autorisation du Mensonge pour la Réconciliation: Une Perspective Islamique"-
https://www.tawaf.fr/lautorisation-du-mensonge-pour-la-reconciliation-une-perspective-islamique
5 Honesty in Islam - Azhar Observatory-
https://azhar.eg/observer-fr/replies/ArtMID/6142/ArticleID/31584/L%E2%80%99honn234tet233-en-Islam
6 Authorizing Lies for Reconciliation: An Islamic Perspective - Tawaf-
https://www.tawaf.fr/lautorisation-du-mensonge-pour-la-reconciliation-une-perspective-islamique
7 Jewish views on lying- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jewish_views_on_lying
8 Ideals and values/Truth and honesty
https://hindupedia.com/en/Ideals_and_Values/Truth_%26_Honesty
9 The truth of lies - Luc-Thomas Somme- Cairn Info 2005-
https://shs.cairn.info/revue-d-ethique-et-de-theologie-morale-2005-HS-page-33?lang=fr#s2n4
10 Time structuring in transactional analysis - https://analysetransactionnelle.fr/p-La_Structuration_du_Temps
11 True self and false self - Wikipedia - https://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vrai_self_et_faux_self
12 Prosocial lies: lies to make us look good - 15/10/2024-
https://nospensees.fr/mensonges-prosociaux-des-mensonges-pour-bien-paraitre/
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